“My wife wants to have a kid,” he says, “but I don’t want kids. I don’t have anything to offer a kid. I don’t have much money. I don’t have a job. I’m unemployed.”
We’re sitting on a park bench in Union Square. This guy is slumped over, his slack-jawed gaze going back to the last century.
“Okay,” I say. “What’s something in life that makes you go wow?”
“Music.” He smiles a little, sits up straighter.
“And what’s important to you about music?”
“I play guitar real good. I love that. And I like singing, I do that real well.”
A flash of light — with energetic surprise, his eyes open wider, he relaxes — suddenly comes over his face.
“I could teach my kid to play guitar and sing. I’m a good teacher, I could teach her lots of stuff. And I’d take care of her real good.”
He turns and looks at his wife sitting at the other end of the bench. He doesn’t say anything to her, yet.
He turns back and says to me softly, “Yeah. I’d like to have a kid.”
When people focus on actions they’re great at which also excite them, they discover their own ways to approach the world.